Day 11-- a Friday!

Diet = good..
Melissa = yucky!

Today is just not my day. I haven't felt the best all day. Couple of reasons.
*I'm tired today.
*My last three days at work have been challenging. I've had to deal with upset parents, troubled students, hand foot mouth outbreaks, and cranky everyone. Wears on me sometimes.
*Im a fully functioning, still able to reproduce, female. Enough said!

Enough feeling sorry for me... Off to run this funky mood off!!!

Day 10...

Seems so monumental. Ten days into this new life... Wow... I'm not totally used to eating this way but it's becoming easier. I had a real scary hard craving today. I nearly gave in. At school today, the afternoon snack was cookies. I wanted one. I have done so well. I deserved it.. Right?

I was ready to chow down. As I started to open the package, one of my sweet two year olds looked up at me and said "more Lissa". This sweetheart calls me daddy or mommy all the time. This was the first time he ever said my name. I knew God was using a child to remind me to focus-- making me think about my own child and where my focus should be! I didn't eat it and gave it to one of my children.

I'm proud of myself! No food in the world can make me feel as good as I do right now. Honestly. I recognize that!

Ten on Tuesday... Even though it's Wednesday..

I can't count the number of blogs I read who do 10 on Tuesdays. My turn...

1. I never thought I'd start to enjoy drinking so much water. But I do. I crave water over most carbs.
2. If I ever have a cheat treat.... This will be it.....

3. The metallic taste in my mouth hit me like a ton of bricks yesterday. I didn't realize what it was until today. I thought I was super nauseated yesterday but I recognized it today that's it's metal. GREAT news for my diet!!!
4. Man I miss running at any type of speed.. Maybe Friday!
5. Someone needs to fix the breaker on the wall our Internet is plugged into. Keeps going out. ANNOYING!!!! I'm married to someone who works with electricity... I need to light a fire under....
6. Pink is my favorite color... No joke!
7. I downloaded 100 new songs for my iPod on Saturday. I need more. I'm already bored with them!
8. Did I mention I cut my hair? Really short. I can't even put all of it in a ponytail. I love the way it feels. Not sure how I feel about how it looks!
9. I'm so girly when it comes to clothes and accessories. I don't care about my hair. I'm trying though! I want to be more caring about everything about my outward look. Work in progress!!!
10. I need some new spring clothes! And new running shoes obviously.

New threads...

I'm giving myself two more weeks and then I'm buying some fun running shirts. It's becoming calente' in Texas and the yoga pants and t-shirt aren't cutting it anymore! I've got my eye on running shorts too but I think my husband might never show up for my races if I wear them... Hehehehe.
Anyway. Here are a couple of shirts I have in mind!!!

Big mistake...

I'm waiting for the salad place down the road to open. Early lunch breaks are a blessing and a curse.
So last night I wanted an omelette. Lucky for me, eggs, bacon and sausage are all things I am supposed to eat. But instead of making it at home, I went somewhere. It tastes good!!! But I forgot how much milk people use to make eggs. But no worries about that because I puked it all up.. Not on purpose. My body rejected the milk! Bad Melissa. Bad Melissa. Gotta start cooking more!!!!

Memories on Monday...

Because talking about weight loss gets old sometimes...

Today, as I sit out on the back porch of my home, surrounded by fences and other homes, I think back to where I was six years ago-- Very very different place. I, and my sweet husband, we're sitting just feet away from the Atlantic Ocean. You could smell, taste, and feel the salt in the air. If you opened your window at night, which we did because we didn't have central air, you could hear the waves coming slowly in.

Before there was Jersey shore, we lived in the southern most tip of new jersey... Cape May! Home to... No one. Many famous people had homes in our small town but I never spotted a one (and I looked and sometimes stalked!!!). Population 2000 in the winter... 200,000 in the spring and summer!! We had a small small small grocery store, no chain restaurants, one gas station, and (gasp) NO WALMART!! It was quite the experience for this Texas girl!

I don't think I even remotely miss living there. So many not so good things happened in our lives during the two years we lived on the Jersey shore. But I do miss living so close to the ocean. I miss being able to think without the sounds of lawn mowers, airplanes, and humming AC units. I miss having my toes in sand instead of on concrete. I miss our 600 square foot house that seemed to hold everything we needed and never felt crowded..

Guess that's why they call them memories. Life now is amazing. But six years ago, I thought life was pretty amazing too. Wonder what I'll think six years from now?!?

Week One Results...

I am not skeptical. I think for the most part, things, ideas, and plans work for people. Especially when you are applying them to yourself. I have been known to take crazy ideas that worked for one person, modify it to fit me, and make it work for me. With that being said... This is working. Mentally and physically. I haven't felt this good in a long time. Who knew? Carbs wear you down!!

So, this week I lost.... Wait for it... Ready????

10 whole and complete pounds!!!!!

I'm only 4 pounds away from a goal I set for myself after Troy was born. Such a great feeling!!!

And many times people reward themselves for keeping strong. Forget that! I'll just have another glass of ice cold water please!

Sunday....

All I want to say today is this....

Let's hear it......

For the weekend...
I'm not going to blog about dieting today. I'm doing great. Feeling like a million bucks. I stepped on the scale and nearly fell off at what it read. I'll post the official weeks weight loss on Monday but O-M-G!!!
Today I step away from computer and blog life!!  I want to spend my free time with my boyfriend!!!!

Day 4

Day 3 I was tired. I stayed up very late the two days prior. Totally worth it. Quality phone time with the BFF! I'll give up sleep anytime. I did well on my diet. Minus the fact that I really wanted a cookie mid day... But there are no cookies at work so I was okay!!! I worked through my first real craving!!!

Today I decided to eat out after work. My son was a good boy at school all week and he wanted to. So off we went to Chick fil A. I was nervous. My first time out without carbs. And to a place that I'm addicted to.

Looks kinda good huh? I'm not sure about Buffalo Sauce. Probably not supposed to have it during the initial phase. But I did. And that's okay. I'm okay with that. Remember. Not sweating the small stuff...

I feel good!!!

Day 2....

Another day down. I wonder when I'll stop counting days with this. I say that about running too. I don't even remotely like it. Months into it now I still think about turning back at mile 3!!! My BFF who is a marathon runner says she still questions the whole thing at mile 20!!! It's just something you have to do and you know it!

I ate the exact same thing I ate yesterday. I'm okay with that. It still tasted good and I was so full! One thing I noticed is that I have a lot of energy! Even during my run, I felt I could maybe go further. Hmm... This could be a GREAT thing!!!

Day One...

I, in addition to starting a new eating lifestyle, also started a new work schedule. 7:30 to 4:45!! This is great. But no more morning run. I honestly can't bring myself to wake up at 5:00am!! Just can't do it! So I used my boring treadmill and will have to this week as the rains come down. I'll have to force myself to run in the early evening instead. Small obstacle!

So anyway. I did great today. Did my official weigh in this morning. Ate the most delicious breakfast... Went to work... With a bounce in my step!!! I had a super salad for lunch and a snack. Came home.. Ran.. And cooked this....

I'm so full I could sleep!!! I hope I'm doing this correctly!!!

This is it...

I threw out every single thing that had over 5 carbs. All gone!! I went to the grocery store and bought every single vegetable, meat, and cheese on my list. And two dozen eggs and five bags of salad and here we go. My fridge is pretty!!!!

Remember I have a four year old that likes grapes and juice. No need for him to suffer. And Coke for the husband!

Dedication...

What makes a person dedicated to changing themselves? Mine comes in a couple of different forms.

First and foremost... I want to be old! No joke!! I want to have a full head of gray hair and sip ice tea on the front porch of a beautiful home in North West Texas! I've dreamed and spoken of that since I was very young. I also want to use the excuse to being a total sassafras on being old!!!
My second dedication is to my son Troy. I can't let him down. I need to continue to set a good example of what a mom should be. TV depicts moms as selfish and narcissistic. Maybe some are. I am not. And I have to continue to better myself... For him!!!

I also have this fear of failure. In life. Being a loser. I've failed at things before. I've left those who mean the most to me disappointed and hurt. I cry over that. A lot! I want them to be proud to be close to me. I think when push comes to shove they are, but I don't want them to be worried... That I'll keel over any minute from unhealthy living... That I'm not dedicated to myself as they are to me.

Today as I had lunch at my favorite Chinese Buffett... These were in my fortune cookies. My final inspiration is my God. HE keeps me focused and reminds me in times of doubt... That HE always is my guiding hand!!

Goals

I'm a goal setter. I can't even wake up in the morning without something to aim for by 10:00pm. I have lots of them all day. Wake up and hit the trail by 7:00... Complete my four miles by 8:00. Be out the door for work by 9:00. All simple sounding but I push myself to do just those. It's who I am. In amongst those simple goals are the long term ones. And they are of great importance. And often pretty elaborate and crazy!

So my goals for this..... Just long term. I'll have to make the shorter term ones as I go because I just don't know how my body is going to react.
By December 2012...
Down 50lbs from 3/19
20% body fat
10 mile weekend runner

Simple right? Maybe!

Atkins...

For dummies. Why don't they make that? Honestly this diet is pretty dummy proof. Good thing because I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed. Although my friends and family think I'm intelligent! I just fake it well!

Upon discussions with my amazing friend, who has inspired me beyond belief lately, I'm not going to make this overly difficult. I'll quit if I do. Or get annoyed. No one is on this gravy train with me (oh how I'll miss gravy!!!!) so I need to keep it easy and simple. No measuring stuff. Just eat what's on my list until I'm full!

I'm talking myself into this slowly!

The final Super...

I'm pretty honest to myself. I knew it would take some time for me to build up to changing my life in such a drastic way for me. Give up carbs? Serious? Me?

My parents tell a story of when I was a little girl and going out to dinner. The name of this historic place in Corpus Christi, Texas was Andy's Kitchen. My parents took me there the third week I existed in the world. Anyway, as a toddler I would always want a hamburger steak. The owner at the time would give all the kiddos a lollipop if they finished enough of there food. Never cared about the lollipop. My parents bribed me with the delicious home made bread. If I ate all of my hamburger steak I could have a piece. It became part of my existence in the eating world. Bread with every meal. But my parents had to promise me that I could have it at the end. Much like desserts for most people, I would pack the bread in on top of my very full belly because I wanted it. I loved it!
So the thought of giving that sort of eating habit up is difficult.
I'm not a smoker or a drinker or a candlestick maker. My vice is carbohydrates. And they, much like many vices in life, are killing me!

Pre Day 1

I'm still debating on the posting of all my measurement information. Funny how you think your okay with all that is your shell but when push comes to shove your not okay giving hard facts. What an indicator of not being proud if what you have become.

The time has come...

To say goodbye to being comfortable.  I can't even count the times I have told people that I was happy with everything about my life.  Deep down, I probably am happy with life.  I've become accepting of being happy with living in the negative.  While many people in life aim for this type of mental attitude, it has been brought to my attention that this is my Kryptonite.  This is the downfall of my super powers!

So stage one..  Since January I have worked SO hard on my health.  I, for whatever reason, don't have body issues.  I don't look like a super model.  I don't want to.  I don't even look like a cute 30 year old.  I just don't care.  Maybe it's my overwhelming personality, but I just never cared about what my outside shell looked like.  But let's face it, a person who looks like me...  IS NOT HEALTHY!!  So, as of January 1st, I stopped the fast food.

 

And that lasted really well for.. hmm... TWO weeks!  Because I have a four year old... and I work until 6:30 at night.. and I had a 30 minute lunch break.. and no one was playing this game with me...  It just sucked!  So, I cut DOWN.. and I mean WAY down on fast food...   

My next big change is I started training to run a 5k.  Now, this was SOO out of my comfort zone.  You could basically compare this to Tom, just one day out of nowhere, deciding to never chase Jerry again.  Just doesn't happen!!! (I have a four year old who watches too much TV!!!!) BUT the person who was pushing me to do this...  You just can't let this person down.  Or at least I can't!  VIP times a MILLION!!!!  (more about my best friends in future blogs)  So, I woke up at the crack of dawn some mornings and ran my little heart out.  I started running ONE minute every mile.  Next thing I knew, eight weeks later.....

 Not only did I finish the race (without EMS!!!), I finished second place in my age group.  Now granted, it was a small race.  Only 183 total runners.  And I only placed 43rd TOTAL.  But hey, that's the top HALF dude!!!  And I rolled my ankle on some rock (that I later went back and picked up) and had to walk most of the race!  But thank goodness for all that conditioning because I was able to walk pretty fast, instead of running!

But here's my issue.  Because I am burning SO many calories in the morning running over 3 miles five times a day...  I am STARVING!!!  In February, I started my 1200 calories per day diet.  Did AMAZING!!!  Lost 20lbs in a MONTH!!!  But I can't do that.  I am too hungry and have started going into starvation mode.  I need something where I can eat!!!  and eat as much as I want!!!  My lifestyle is just too active.  I teach small small small children...  ages 18months to 24months to be exact.  They keep me MOVING!!!  It's just too many calories burned per day.  My body is angry!